**HELLO friends! Thank you for your patience AND for reading along with this little story. Which is about to be a not so little story. The first draft of the entire book is now going through some much-needed editing, and there are some changes and surprises in store for our innkeepers. To those of you have have been with us on this journey, this will be the last “chapter” entered on this blog. But you can follow our progress on social media at https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61574196809869 (where I have exactly “0” followers – you can be #1!) or on Threads or Instagram (victoria.s.osborne). I’ll be posting more about the book’s progress, and if you send me an email, I’ll be sure to hook you up with a copy when it is “finished.”
Madeline was sitting in her favorite chair with a cup of tea, enjoying the sound of the pouring rain and the joy having nothing on her agenda for the first time in a month. So of course that’s when the phone rang.
She let it ring five times before reaching over and answering with a less than enthusiastic “Five Maples Inn…” Why don’t you just fuck right off? she added to herself.
“Is this the Five Maples Inn?” the nervous voice at the other end of the call asked.
She had to stop herself from just hanging up the phone, and instead said, “Yes. How can I help you?” in her best imitation of her favorite Vermonter: Pleasant Lady from the Vermont Department of Liquor Control.
“So… I read your blog about your ghosts and wanted to see if me and my team-we’re called PEST, Paranormal Enthusiasts Seeking the Truth-can come investigate?”
Madeline almost spit her tea right into the phone. “PEST?” She wondered if that was a purposeful acronym or if it was unintended. “Um, I don’t know…” She quickly grabbed her cell phone and shot Taylor a text message telling her to get to the main house immediately.
The guy continued his sales pitch-poorly. “We’re just starting out, but have some really cool equipment we bought on eBay, and we are ready to believe-“
A cool breeze announced the arrival of Simeon, who loved to eavesdrop on phone calls. “What is a PEST?” Simeon asked. “Is one on the phone?”
Madeline almost choked on the snort she tried to silence. “Always,” she mouthed, rolling her eyes for dramatic effect.
Taylor rushed into the room, panting and holding her side from the monumental effort of dashing across the yard through the rain to assist with whatever emergency was happening. “Is everything… okay?”
In response, Madeline put the phone on speaker and set it down between the three of them.
The guy was still talking. “-super professional and serious because we want PEST to be the best!”
Madeline cringed at the sudden exclamation.
“PEST?” Taylor mouthed in confusion. Simeon merely shrugged.
“That sounds interesting, uh… What is your name?” Madeline asked the caller.
“Kevin,” he said. “I’m Kevin.”
“Well, Kevin, I’m not really sure about having a ghost investigation here at the house.” Madeline said for Taylor and Simeon’s benefit. “What would you need from us?”
Kevin was quick to explain, tripping over his words in his eagerness at being given a tiny ray of hope. “Basically, we come out to your house for an overnight investigation using all kinds of equipment to see who’s haunting you.”
“Who’s haunting who?” Simon practically shouted.
“You’re haunting us, weirdo,” whispered Taylor.
“So like those shows on TV,” Madeline said, responding to Kevin.
“Yeah-like those shows on TV. But we don’t have as many people. There are just three of us. I’m the tech guy, then there’s Brooke, our psychic, and her twin, Brian, our researcher.”
“And would you want us to leave while you’re investigating? Or would we be able to stay?”
“Oh, you could definitely stay, and even help us if you want!”
“I most certainly do want to hunt for ghosts!” Simeon whisper-exclaimed.
“I wonder if we’ll find one…” Taylor smirked.
“And of course we’ll let you keep any evidence we collect, and you can even put it on your blog!” Kevin was getting more and more excited at their openness to this opportunity. Probably because everyone has hung up by this point, Madeline thought. “As long as you credit PEST with the finds.”
#######
With only 48 hours before the arrival of PEST, Madeline and Taylor swung into action cleaning and organizing as if their lives depended on it. It had been raining for two days
“Do you think they’ll want to go in the basement?” Madeline asked.
“Oh gawd, I hope not because I am not cleaning that nonsense.” The look of disdain was clear on Taylor’s face.
“I’ll go down and just look around, you know-make sure there aren’t any dead bodies or anything.” Madeline was only half-joking. “When your dad finds out about this he might want to add me to the dead body collection.”
“I can accompany you,” Simeon offered. Thus far he had been very unhelpful in their preparations for the show. Being non-corporeal definitely put a dent in his ability to hold a broom-or anything, for that matter.
“Let’s do this.” Madeline grabbed a flashlight and headed through the kitchen. She hesitated for a moment before she opened the door. She had always felt uncomfortable in the basement, beyond just the standard creepy, spider- and snake-infested, dark-space-induced claustrophobia. Something down there was wrong.
She had barely taken three steps into the basement when the sound of rushing water distracted Madeline from the creepy crawlers and bad vibes. “You’ve got to be shitting me.”
Madeline shone her flashlight up from a river on the floor, past the well pump, and up to the point where the wooden floor beams of the house sat directly on the fieldstone foundation. And from under one of the beams, a cascade of water flowed into the basement, past the boiler, and towards the sump pump. Which was conveniently not working.
“There appears to be a waterfall in the basement,” Simeon observed dryly.
“Never mind the waterfall! Look at the top of the foundation, and that pipe-and is that asbestos? Just kill me.” Madeline swung the flashlight around the rest of the basement. It was not a pretty sight. Beyond the dead mice, there was an impressively long snake skin floating merrily along with the current, mixed with a gazillion pieces of what looked like rotten wood chips.
“I need to go turn the pump on, unless somehow you can manage that for me…” Madeline didn’t have to wait for Simeon’s response. She knew the answer. With a groan, she sloshed through the filthy and cold rainwater towards the sump pump. “I am now going to plug this into the wall,” she announced to the basement, “while standing in water. I really will end up haunting this place.” She grabbed the pump plug, held her breath, and quickly stuck the metal prongs into the live electrical outlet.
“I’m alive!” she danced as the pump whirred to life. She looked over at Simeon and was puzzled by his reaction. No wry comments, no sarcasm. Instead, he had turned to the side, and his eyes were fixed on something Madeline couldn’t see in the far corner of the basement.
“Um, Madeline?” Simeon’s voice faltered. “We aren’t alone down here.”